Normally, I don’t mind walking. After all, it’s one of the only physical things that humans really excel at. I can go for miles without getting tired. However, this joy of walking does not extend to extreme weather circumstances.
Today, it was nearly a hundred, which is bad enough, but when you factor in the oppressive humidity, it’s just plain miserable. And it wasn’t like I was walking the eighth of a mile to the mailbox, I had two and a half miles to walk home in the sun smack dab in the middle of the day. If I were three, I probably would have sat down on the sidewalk and pitched a fit.
The moment I stepped outside, I could feel the heat enveloping me the way that water does when you leap into a pool. My initial urge was to start flailing and yelling, “Get it off! Get it off! Stop touching me! Stop touching me NOW!” But unlike large bugs or unwanted contact, the heat was not going to go anywhere, so I took a deep breath and headed off down the street towards home.
When I get really, really hot, usually after running for several miles in the summer, my face starts to turn pale green and red-purple in splotches. It’s not sweaty, just multi-colored. As walked through the uptown commercial area, I tried very hard to will my face to stay normal. Of course, like many things that I try to will to fruition, I was not successful. And by the time I got home, it was even worse.
Like after any bad experience, the moment I stepped into the house, I declared that I was never leaving ever, ever again and would very happily be the lawfully wedded wife of our central air. Now, I recognize that at some point I will have to venture out into the heat for some period of time, but I am going to delay it as long as possible and I will scotch tape ice cubes to my arms and legs.
Tomorrow’s heat index is 115, and it’s supposed to be even more humid than today. I plan on sitting next to an AC vent all day and reading.