Musings on Transparency

I’ve known for a little while now that people I know are reading my blog. I’m not talking about my closest friends, of course–they’ve known all along–but the people who I see in class, the people who I pass in the hall, the people who I know nothing more about than their names. It’s a strange feeling to know that they’re seeing everything I post here, reading it, digesting it, and adjusting their perception of me. I write candidly, and my life is on display.

But I don’t mind. I never write anything here that I would be uncomfortable announcing to a room of fifty people. I shy away from cruel judgments of others or things–those are better left in my head and pushed away as immoral. I don’t post secrets. I try to never quote people without asking their permission. This blog is a safe representation of myself and the people I talk about.

In a way, it’s terribly exciting to know that people are interested in me enough to read it. It’s really nice to know they care. I am always trying to “figure people out,” to understand why they act the way that they do, and what’s behind the persona that they present to the world. It’s only fair that I also offer the insight that I seek.

There’s a large sense of revelry in living your life without confines. It’s liberating to tell people how you truly feel, what scares you, what you fear, and what makes you happy and hopeful. I like sharing things with the world and discovering what world shares with me. It makes for a more peaceful existence. Besides, I love things, people, and places too much to ever keep my joy and interest quiet. There’s just too much beauty.

There’s really only been one thing bad about finding out about this and that’s my insatiable desire to know who is reading my blog. I can’t help but look at people suspiciously now and wonder if they’ve seen it and what they think. Some part of me is desperate for their approval. But ultimately, none of that matters. This blog is really just for me to say the things I’m dying to share and to become a better writer.

So a warm hello to people who have discovered my blog and also know me in real life. It’s nice to have you here. I hope you enjoy reading my blog as much as I love writing it. And never be afraid to ask me about it when you see me or to leave a comment. I’m really curious to know who you are.